Update on J

Tuesday night was really bad. J called me around 10 (maybe? I've been up late with this every night, so the time kind of blurs.) and was sobbing. The only thing I heard when I answered the phone was her sobbing and gasping for breath. She had been hitting the walls with her arms (I saw the bruises yesterday) and had also been cutting again. Her 16-year-old sister happened to be home for once and tried to get her to unlock the door to no avail. J was at the end of her rope and kept repeating that she just wanted to die so she wouldn't have to deal with the depression and hopelessness anymore.
I did the best I could to keep a calm voice, but my whole body was shaking the entire time I was on the phone with her. In fact, I was still shaking for about an hour after we hung up. But God is faithful and provided the opportunity for me to share some of my own story with her. She feels so abandoned by her mom, which is understandable because they rarely see each other, and J is home alone 9 nights out of 10 for the entire night. I was able to talk about how my dad skipped out on a lot of my life for several years and how that's when I really began to depend on God as my Heavenly Father. She had also mentioned that she felt like things would never be any better, and I took the opportunity to tell her about my dad going to jail for two years. At the time, it was embarrassing, and I didn't think it would help. Now I can see that it was probably the best thing that could've happened to him (and our relationship, for that matter). I don't know if this encouraged her or not, but it gave her time to calm down a little and get some perspective.
We talked for over an hour Tuesday night about what kind of choices she has, how I can only help her so much without parental involvement/consent, and about taking things one day at a time. To be honest, I wasn't sure she had heard a word of it; I was just trusting God to carry her through. I knew she hadn't been eating, so before we hung up, I offered to bring her some of our leftover pasta for lunch. I don't know why I did this, but I just felt like I needed to meet as many of her needs as possible.
Well, she showed up for lunch yesterday looking like crap. You could really see the struggle on her face. She stared blankly at the wall for most of my conference period. (She has senior out, so she didn't have a class to be in.) She ended up staying in my room for the last period of the day and ate ALL of the pasta. :) She was in a better mood as she left school yesterday, but I was expecting another bad night.
God took care of it. J called me about 10:00 to say that she had called her dad and told him she didn't want to be home alone...and he came and PICKED HER UP. Hallelujah! :) They went out for ice cream and talked a little before he took her back to his house. She didn't tell him about the cutting, but it's a start. She came in this morning (SO happy - I could see a difference in her demeanor immediately) and told me that they're going to make it a weekly thing. I was so proud of her for taking a step to get help.
I had dinner tonight with some friends, and now I am more than a little paranoid about this situation. I know that I have approached this with the best of intentions, but I'm not sure how well I've covered myself legally. I was under the impression that as long as I told the counselor, I would be covered, but now I'm not so sure. Please pray for me. I am literally sick to my stomach about all of it.

Busy, Busy, Busy

I apologize for my lack of updates lately. I've been struggling to teach, plan, and grade at Job #1; read, comprehend, and write about FOUR books for my two graduate classes (oh, yeah-I have to attend those classes, too!); show up and work at Job #2, which is now, thankfully, only 2 days a week; and on top of all of that, I'm now apparently a counselor on the side as well. :)
I do not begrudge the counseling job. In fact, it remains heavy on my heart and is the main reason for this post. About a week and a half ago, a former student of mine, J, confessed to me that she has been cutting herself for the last seven years. I taught her last year and got to know her pretty well, or so I thought. She has been dating another one of my former students, L (also a girl), on and off for about 4 years. They have a toxic, selfish, explosive relationship. J's mom works the night shift, and her father has remarried and lives about 20 miles away. Many, many things have built up to bring J where she is now. J and L broke up again last week, and J says she is ready for it to be final. She went to church with me two Saturdays ago, so she is obviously hungry in that area as well. J is home alone most night for hours at a time, which is not good in the current situation. She says she knows she needs therapy but is scared of being readmitted to the hospital (she went twice freshman year). While researching the topic online, I came across To Write Love on Her Arms, an organization that addresses people who self-injure. It actually linked to a counseling program in a nearby city, and I called today for info. J's dad actually lives in the same city.
Please pray for several specific things:

1. that I will speak only God's love/words to J
2. that J will follow through with therapy of some sort
3. that all of the requirements line up for the best therapy available to be possible
4. that J will avoid L
5. that opportunities will come up to share about Christ's redeeming love with J

Grad School...

...is HARD! Thankfully, the first night of my second class ended early, or I would've been WAY overwhelmed. Tonight's class was Applied Linguistics, and I actually think I will enjoy it, but the academic side of it is huge. My other class, something about teaching ESL students with the SIOP model (yeah, no idea on that one yet), is focused more on the practical side of things. I have lots of homework in addition to work related to my real job - teaching!

On the plus side, I did get to skip Meet-the-Teacher night. YAY! ;)

I'm Surviving

Well, I survived the first week of school and am almost finished with the second. :) I seem to have a mostly good group of students. There are a few potentially shady ones, but they are laying low for now.

My first graduate class began last night. I already feel overwhelmed. I have to read 4 chapters by next Wednesday, and my second class begins on Monday! Ack!!! I miss summer.